<p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">诗 会：中华慈善诗会</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">校 长：陌上花开</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">班主任：爱明、黄金岁月</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">辅 导：惜 往 日</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">编 辑：爱明、如梦</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">审 核：爱 明 点评 </span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">作 者：联36班学员</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;"> （本篇各位作者已经授权）</span></p> <p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">分咏（山；水）成联。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">要求：</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">1，不犯题字。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">2，离形得似。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">3，对仗工稳。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">4，七言成联。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">5，不许叠字。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">6，形成意联。</span></p> <p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">1. 黑眼睛</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">钟灵叠翠千秋画；</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">挂壁流弦万古琴。</span></p><p class="ql-block">评：有色有声，比喻夸张！大气！</p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">仁人乐汝知宽厚；</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">智者欣之享逸悠。</span></p><p class="ql-block">评：以仁者乐山，智者乐水之典分咏，读来自然抱朴。</p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">司马常思眉黛远；</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">伊人暗送眼波盈。</span></p><p class="ql-block">评：以“山是眉峰聚，水是眼波横”诗句分咏，另辟蹊径！</p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">愚公不拔攻坚志；</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">精卫勇怀掷石心。</span></p><p class="ql-block">评：以愚公移山对精卫填海，构思巧妙！</p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">2. 黄金岁月</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">青绿地灵春万里；</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">潺湲天籁岁千年。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:18px;">评：有色有声！境象大气！</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">3. 如梦 </span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">嵯峨拔势祥云绕；</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">浩荡推舟旭日斜。</span></p><p class="ql-block">评：景语美，白描手法运用得当！</p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">千帆逐日摇轻翼；</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">万木迎春启翠屏。</span></p><p class="ql-block">评：境象旷达，比喻手法运用得当！</p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">云天浩渺渔舟晚；</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">峭壑巍峨晓月残。</span></p><p class="ql-block">评：很有画面感！意境美！</p> <p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">4. 君智 </span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">岚霭氤氲孤寺现；</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">烟波浩渺客舟行。</span></p><p class="ql-block">评：如画的景语！白描手法运用得当！</p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">苍岫微云私窃语；</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">碧漪皓月总含情。</span></p><p class="ql-block">评：拟人手法运用得当。虚实相生！</p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">5. 默 </span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">满目青峦披秀色；</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">三江碧浪起欢声。</span></p><p class="ql-block">评：景语动静相宜。峦、江、浪可再琢！</p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">6. 木瓜 </span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">三面峻层飘黛影；</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">一湾玉带荡粼光。</span></p><p class="ql-block">评：景语如画！美！</p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">太行磐石迎新貌；</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">林县天河泛绿波。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">（天河：红旗渠）</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:18px;">评：比喻得当，以景达情，表现经过老一辈辛劳开创，太行山区人民迎来了如今幸福的生活！赞！</span></p> <p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">7. 杨柳依依 </span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">长风浪送千帆远；</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">瑞鸟巅鸣万树荣。</span></p><p class="ql-block">评：大气的景观！美！</p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">窗间树色连巉净；</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">户外岚光带澈浮。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:18px;">评：虚实相生！词句清雅！</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">风集祥云笼碧岫；</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">燕回丽日映清鳞。</span></p><p class="ql-block">评：诗情画意！美！</p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">8. 全 兴 </span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">云移险峻乾坤大；</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">瀑挂空灵日月延。</span></p><p class="ql-block">评：思接千里！意象旷达！赞！</p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">万岭枫红添锦绣；</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">千弯涧白露峥嵘。</span></p><p class="ql-block">评：色彩鲜明！如画的美景！</p> <p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">9. 瓁 境 </span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">登高此处青烟绕；</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">垂钓其中锦鲤欢。</span></p><p class="ql-block">评：有生活有意趣！</p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">起伏高岗飘玉带；</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">奔腾大浪溅冰花。</span></p><p class="ql-block">评：很有画面感！注意避免近义词犯题！</p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">10. 上善若水 </span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">巉秀香炉连碧汉；</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">恢弘瀑布入瑶烟。</span></p><p class="ql-block">评：气势恢宏！美！</p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">狙猿跋越啼乖调；</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">鸬饲潜游舞异姿。</span></p><p class="ql-block">评：富有生趣！赞！</p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">复岭逶迤腾绿浪；</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">三江浩渺化青弦。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:18px;">评：化用了毛爷爷的词，大气！注意避免同义词犯题！</span></p> <p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">11. 星 星</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">登临绝顶抒心志；</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">遥望波涛咏赞歌。</span></p><p class="ql-block">评：情景交融！注意避免近义词犯题！</p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">12. 梧 桐 </span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">高低各有擎天骨；</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">急缓皆存入海心。</span></p><p class="ql-block">评：将山与水的特性品格描述到位！赞！</p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">耸身万载橫风雨；</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">驰志千年净地天。</span></p><p class="ql-block">评：夸张和拟人手法运用得棒！境象旷达！赞！</p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">娇容不老千年绿；</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">翠体常新万载欢。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:18px;">评：拟人手法棒！将山与水的特质表达无余！必须赞！</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">虎啸一声传砥柱；</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">龙吟百里起狂澜。</span></p><p class="ql-block">评：曲笔达意！夸张手法得当！</p><p class="ql-block"><br></p> <p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">13. 琼之岛 </span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">断蛇埋地思伊尹；</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">钓主垂杆有子牙。</span></p><p class="ql-block">评：以典成联，思路开阔！</p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">夕阳西坠层林染；</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">帆影东移群鸟飞。</span></p><p class="ql-block">评：山水美景如画！</p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">14. 洛兮 </span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">万壑争流行日月；</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">千岩竞秀笑春风。</span></p><p class="ql-block">评：比拟得当！思接千里！</p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">层峦叠翠云霄耸；</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">远瀑含烟雨露深。</span></p><p class="ql-block">评：注意避免近义词犯题字！</p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">苍烟落照千峰秀；</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">白浪平沙九曲长。</span></p><p class="ql-block">评：境象旷达！美！</p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p> <p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">15. 人生无悔 </span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">苍松古刹云中隐；</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">明月清泉画里流。</span></p><p class="ql-block">评：一隐一流，有开有阖！山水美景如画！</p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">千里云峰迎旭日；</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">一帆风浪送轻舟。</span></p><p class="ql-block">评：曲笔达意，用词蕴藉！</p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">巍峨玉笔穿云出；</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">浩荡春江入海流。</span></p><p class="ql-block">评：比喻得当！注意避免近义词犯题！</p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">16. 怡然 </span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">渡头犬吠高墙内；</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">栈道莺啼翠柏中。</span></p><p class="ql-block">评：富于生活气息！对于水的表达偏弱了些！</p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">柴门草岸观帆影；</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">古寺崖间响磬音。</span></p><p class="ql-block">评：曲笔达意！美！</p> <p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">17. 春 江 </span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">碧簪曲径通孤寺；</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">青带飞花入钓舟。</span></p><p class="ql-block">评：化用韩愈诗句～江作青罗带，山如碧玉簪。诗情画意！美！</p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">18. 五月的云 </span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">高耸入云难见顶；</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">低迴通海不横流。</span></p><p class="ql-block">评：将山与水的特征表达到位！</p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">19. 神 采 </span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">黄河怒号冲龙庙；</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">华岳峥嵘耸汉霄。</span></p><p class="ql-block">评：拟人手法运用得当！注意近义词犯题！</p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">泛舸秦粮延九百；（泛舟之役）</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">争雄淆战灭三军。（淆山之战）</span></p><p class="ql-block">评：以古代名战发生地分咏，思路新奇！</p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">巍峨祖脉三千里(秦岭）</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">灿烂龙根一万年(黄河)</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:18px;">评：比拟，夸张手法到位！歌颂中华脉与母亲河！龙根可再琢！</span></p> <p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">20. 执着 </span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">青峰半入云霄里；</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">飞瀑俄消沟壑间。</span></p><p class="ql-block">评：峰、瀑可再琢！</p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">21. 夏花 </span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">登高眺远寒烟渺；</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:22px;">载月行舟故梦长。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:18px;">评：虚实相生！意境美！颇有怀乡思旧之意！</span></p>