婚姻情感咨询的落地服务技巧和SFBT特色治疗（一）

追梦

<p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">公开体验课：</p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">婚姻情感咨询的落地服务技巧和 SFBT 特色疗法（一）</p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">主讲导师：</p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1"> Simon Neo Teck Koon 博士</p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">美国专业心理学学院心理学博士（团体心理治疗）</p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">美国认证团体心理治疗师（ CGP )</p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">美国专业心理学学院 SFBT 认证著名治疗师</p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">美国专业心理学学院管理教员</p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">新加坡华人，新加坡著名婚烟情感专家</p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">特邀翻译：海咛博士</p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">新加坡心理行业协会主席、心理学博士</p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">新加坡教育部（ MOE )SM2第十七届学生资深辅导老师</p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">新加坡 ACC 心理辅导培训学院资深讲师</p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">新加坡国际万黛兰姐妹会特邀心理健康讲师</p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">新加坡博林国际学校辅导中心创办人</p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">直播时间：12月27日20:00-21:30</p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1"><br></p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">注意：扫描下面的二维码，可以回看课程相关内容。</p> <p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">CONTENTS /内容</p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1"> INTRODUCТ ION /介绍</p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1"> AVOIDING THE RECIPE FOR FAlLURE /避免失败的秘诀</p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">- THE 4 WARNING SIGNS /4个警告标志</p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">OUR VALUES DONT MATCHI ! REALLY ?/我们的价值观不匹配!!真的吗?</p> <p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">MARRIED LIFE IS FULL OF EXCITEMENT AND FRUSTRATION :婚姻生活充满了兴奋和无奈：</p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">* IN THE FIRST YEAR OF MARRIAGE，THE MAN SPEAKS AND THEWOMAN LISTENS .／结婚第一年，男人说话，女人听</p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">* IN THE SECOND YEAR，THE WOMAN SPEAKS AND THE MAN LISTENS .／第二年，女人说话，男人听。</p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">* IN THE THIRD YEAR，THEY BOTH SPEAK AND THE NEIGHBORS LISTEN .／第三年，他们俩说话，邻居听。</p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1"><br></p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">感悟：</p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">离婚的原因是亲密关系中的一方期待不能的到满足；想成就婚姻的话就得帮助配偶成功。</p><p class="ql-block"><br></p> <p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">MASTERS OF MARRIAGE :／婚姻硕士： </p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">HAVE ACCESS TO A SENSE OF HUМOUR EVEN IN CONFLICТ-/</p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">即使在冲突中也能获得幽默感 </p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">( SENSE OF HUМOUR IS KEY TO INTEREST & SHARED AFFECTION )（幽默感是兴趣和分享感情的关键）</p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">5:1 POSITIVE TO NEGATIVE WOMENTS -5:1积极对消极情绪 </p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">HIGH PREDICTION OF HAPPINESS / DIVORCE ./</p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">幸福／离婚的高预测。</p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">HAPPY COUPLES DO МORE HAPPY THINGS TOGETHER ./</p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">幸福的夫妻一起做更幸福的事。</p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1"> EVENTS-OF-THE-DAY CONVERSATIONS ARE IMPORTANT ./</p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">日常对话很重要。</p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1"><br></p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">感悟：</p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">婚姻内的战争和冲突，这是健康表达的需求。即便是在冲突中，也要保持幽默，要用幽默化解冲突。</p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1"><span style="font-size:18px;">5:1积极对消极情绪——要用带来5次快乐才能弥补带来的1次伤害。清除消极情绪的成本其实还蛮高，这一点得特别注意才行！</span></p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1"><span style="font-size:18px;"></span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p> <p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">WHAT ARE YOUR FEELINGS ABOUT MARRIAGE ?</p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">你对婚姻有什么感受？</p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">WHAT DO YOU EXPECT IN A MARRIAGE PARTNER ?／</p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">你对婚姻伴侣有什么期望？</p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">WHAT ANXIETIES OR FEARS DO YOU HAVE ABOUT MARRIAGE ?／</p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">你对婚姻有什么焦虑或恐惧？</p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">ARE YOU OPTIMISTIC OR PESSIMISTIC ABOUT BEING ABLE TO SUSTAIN AMARRIAGE RELATIONSHIP ? WHERE DO Т HEY COME FROM ？／</p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">你对维持婚姻关系是乐观还是悲观？他们来自哪里？</p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1"> WHAT DOES COMMITMENT HAVE TO DO WITН WORKING THROUGH PROBLEMS ?／</p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">承诺与解决问题有什么关系？</p> <p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">FACTS ABOUT MARRIAGE :</p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">关于婚姻的事实:</p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1"><br></p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">FIGHTING IS HEALTHY - AIRS GRIEVANCES ./</p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">战斗是健康的——表达不满。</p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">RELATIONSHIP GROWS AS DIFFERENCES ARE RECONCILED ./</p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">关系日趋密切的差异进行对帐。</p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">PROBLEMS OFTEN DEVELOP DURING TIMES OF TRANSITION ./</p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">问题往往在过渡时期出现。</p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1"> A HAPPY MARRIAGE IS GPOD FOR YOUR HEALTH ./</p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">美满的婚姻有益于您的健康。</p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1"><br></p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">感悟：</p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">婚姻内的战争和冲突，这是健康表达的需求。即便是在冲突中，也要保持幽默，要用幽默化解冲突。</p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">爱情是一场长长的甜梦，婚姻则是惊醒梦中人的闹钟。</p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">避免婚姻失败的四个“警告标志”：批评、鄙视、防御力、阻挠。</p><p class="ql-block"><br></p> <p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">CRITICISМ/批评</p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1"><br></p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">ATTACKING SOMEONE'S PERSONALITY OR CHARACTER /</p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">攻击某人的个性或性格 </p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">YOU ALWAYS …YOU NEVER …/</p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">你总是………你从来没有……… </p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">YOUR CHARACTER IS FLAWED /</p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">你的性格有缺陷</p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU ?!?/</p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">你怎么了?!? </p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">WHY DO / DON＇T YOU ..?!?/</p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">你为什么/不.?!?</p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU DIDN＇T HELPOUT . YOU ' RE JUST SO IRRESPONSIBLE .”</p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">“我不敢相信你没有帮忙。你太不负责任了。”</p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">IN GENERAL , WOMEN ARE МORE LIKELY TO PULL THIS INTO CONFLIC.</p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">一般来说,女性更有可能将其卷入冲突。</p><p class="ql-block"><br></p> <p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">CONTEMPT ／鄙视</p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">INTENTIONAL INSULTING OR NAME - CALLING ／故意侮辱或辱骂</p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">1. NAME CALLING ／不好的称呼</p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">2. HOSTILE HUМOR - MEAN TEASING ／敌对的幽默﹣刻薄的戏弄</p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">3.МOCKERY - MIMICKING , MAKING FUN OF , USING RIDICULING WORDS AND ACTIONS ／嘲弄﹣﹣模仿、取笑、嘲讽的言行</p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">4.BODY LANGUAGE - SNEERING , ROLLING EYES , LOOKING AWAY ,CURLING UPPER LIP ／肢体语言﹣﹣冷笑、翻白眼、移开视线、上唇卷曲</p><p class="ql-block"><br></p> <p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">DEFENSIVENESS／防御力</p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">FEELING VICTIMIZED BY OТHERS IN RESPONSE TO CONTEMPT .／因蔑视而</p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">感到被他人伤害。</p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">1.DENYING RESPONSIBILITY :“ IT WAS'NTMY FAULT . IT WAS YOUR FAULT ."／否认责任：“这不是我的错。是你的错。”</p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">2.MAKING EXCUSES YOU COULDN'T HELP IT ; I KNOW I PROMISED I'D GET IT DONE , BUT ..＂／找借口：“我忍不住了；我知道我答应过我会完成它，但是。</p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">3.BROKEN RECORD :“ YOU DON' T LISTEN TO ME .... WELL , YOU NEVER LISTEN TO ME 。＂／破纪录：“你不听我的。好吧，你从来不听我的。</p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">YES - BUTTING ／对，但</p> <p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">STONEWALLING ／阻挠</p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">WITHDRAWING FROМ INTERACTIONS ／退出互动</p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">1. THE STONEWALLER JUST REМOVES HIМ SELF BY TURNING INTO A STONEWALL ／石墙者只是通过变成石墙来移除自己</p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">2. ABOUT 85 PERCENT OF THEM ARE MEN ／其中约85％是男性</p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">3.THE MESSAGE TO THE SPOUSE IS THE SAME : I AM WITHDRAWING ，DISENGAGING FROМ ANY MEANINGFUL INTERACTION WITH YOU ./</p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">给配偶的信息是一样的：我正在退缩，不再与你进行任何有意义的互动。</p> <p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">STONEWALLING ／阻挠</p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1"><br></p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">WITHDRAWING FROМ INTERACTIONS ／退出互动</p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">4. IF EITHER SPOUSE REFUSES To COMMUNICATE WHENEVER CONFLICT </p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1"> ARISES , IT CAN BE HARD TO HEALA MARRIAGE ／如果任何一方在发生冲突时拒绝沟通，婚姻就很难愈合</p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1"><br></p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">5. ONCE EITHER SPOUSE DEVELOPS INTO A HABITUAL STONEWALLER , THE MARRIAGE BECOMES FRAGlLE .／一旦配偶中的任何一方发展成为习惯性的阻挠者，婚姻就会变得腕弱。</p> <p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">直播收看此时已经达到85913</p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">高级考证班公开体验课</p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">婚姻情感咨询的落地服务技巧和 SFBT特色疗法（一）</p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1"><br></p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1"> Know Your Values 了解你的价值观</p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1"><br></p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">FRIENDSНIP 友谊 </p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">RESPONSIВILITY 责任</p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">SPIRI Т UALITY 灵性/宗教 </p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">KNOLEDGE 知识</p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">HEALTH 健康</p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">FAMILY 家庭</p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">НONESTY 诚实</p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1"> COMMUNITY 社区</p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1"> RESPECТ 尊重</p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1"> RISKTAKING 风险</p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1"> GROНТH 发展</p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1"> WISDOМ 智慧</p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1"><br></p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">测试：</p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">请夫妻双方对以上12价值观取向按照重要性从前到后依次排序，最看重的拍在第一位，次看中的排在第二位，依次类推……</p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">价值观的排序不同才是冲突的根源，要尊重对方的价值观，照顾到对方的价值观，才容易照顾到对方的感受，这样做才有利于维护健康的亲密关系。</p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1"><br></p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">咨询师中止来访者的战争的三步骤：</p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">第一步，伸开两臂，掌心向外，指尖向上喊停；</p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">第二步，上述步骤无果，那么咨询师得站起来再次喊停！</p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">第三步，要引导来访者双方看到自己带来的破坏才行！</p><p class="ql-block"><br></p> <p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">文 马金龙</p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">截图 马金龙</p><p class="ql-block ql-indent-1">编辑 马金龙</p>